Bacon Lovers UNITE!
by Iluvcandyiluvcandy
Summary: Join Touko and her club, Bacon Lovers UNITE! I know, sucky summary. Review! I will give you bacon! (:P) Crackfic.
1. BACON LOVERS UNITE!

**AN: Since today's a Friday, my mum and dad have to go to work! And since they have to go, they're leaving me here! YAY! Here comes the story!**

At an old, abandoned colledge building...

Touko paced around the empty classroom. "Where are they? They said they would be here 15 minutes ago!"

Suddenly, a girl around 15 years old poked her head in the doorway. "Hello, is this the Bacon Lover UNITE club?"

"Why it is!" Touko replied, overjoyed at having at least one person come. "What's your name?"

"Annie." **(And yes, bacon lovers, this is moi) **said person replied. She had long black hair and sunglasses over her eyes. **(What? Am I supposed to give out my identity?)**

"Welcome! Have a seat in one of those three chairs over there!"Touko said, pointing to a group of three chairs.

Annie obliged, **(wow! Good me for learning such an epic word!) **and soon another person poked her head in the doorway.

"This is Bacon Lovers UNITE club, right?"

"Yup!" Touko replied. "What's your name?"

"Pokegirl, **(Yup, Sushi, that's you.) **but you can call me Sushi."

"SUSHI!" Annie screamed, leaping up from her chair. "I thought you'd never come!"

She then proceeded to drag "Sushi" over to the group of chairs and chat.

"Blahblahblahblahblah bacon is epic and stuff" she rambled.

Sushi shot Touko a glance as if to say, _Help me!_ to which Touko just shook her head.

Luckily for Sushi, yet another girl poked her head into the door. Yes, the door. Apparently Sushi had closed the door and the girl banged her head into it.

Annie cracked up as the girl said, "Ow." in a Canadian accent. **(Do Canadians even _have _accents?) **

"Girl" pouted and said, "This must be the Bacon Lovers UNITE club, right?"

"Why do I keep repeating myself?" Touko said with a sigh. "Take a seat over there."

"Ok! By the way, my name's ImaginationisAwesome123, but you can call me Ima." **(Yup, Ima, that's you.)**

Touko stood on her fancy commentor's platform thingy and cleared her throat. "This meeting of the Bacon Lovers UNITE club will now come to order."

Everyone went quiet.

"So. We all love bacon, right?"

"Yup!" was heard from everyone.

"Lets begin with saying what we like most about it."

Annie went first. "Um, well, I like the fact that its so yummy and stuff! I mean like, it kinda tastes like fried Pork to me! Not that it isn't, it just tastes exactly like it! Speaking of pork, I wonder if mom's cooking any for me! I mean like, it's my favorite food-" **(Yup, I do that alllllll the time) **she was cut off by Sushi, who slapped a hand over her mouth.

"SHUT UP ALREADY!" she yelled.

Annie giggled slightly.

Calming down, Sushi said, "The thing I like most about bacon is that it's so good, like Annie said."

Last was Ima. "Ditto. Plus, it makes me wonder, if pigs are rare in Unova, then what do they use to make bacon, Tepig?"

Everyone shuddered at the thought. "Well then lets go find out!" Touko exclaimed.

"How?" Annie asked stupidly.

"We confront a bacon company, of course!"

"Ohhhhh."

"You guys up for it?"

A chorus of yes's were heard.

"THEN LETS GET GOING!"

**Ok! If you want to be an offical member of the bacon lovers UNITE group, then please fill out this form:**

**Name:**

**Nickname:**

**Why you love bacon:**

**I'll try to pick all of you guys, so bear with me... :P Bye!**

**~Candy**


	2. Shortie, flame me if you want

**AN: Ok, it's a girls night out tonight, so YAY! Anyway, there will be three more people (and one pokemon) in this story now:**

**MsWildLuck**

**Tiger Demon of Light**

**Thorn**

**Flumen Flamma Argo**

**Don't blame me for Thorn! He said, and I quote, "I am part of this club too, Candy. You will include me or perish."**

**Ok, I realised that I forgot to do the disclaimer! So: I do not own any of these people, Thorn, or Pokemon. Darn. :'(**

**On with the story!**

Touko rushed into the meeting room a little late. The inhabitants of the room, a girl, another girl, a Snivy and some other people were glaring at her.

"Ok, sorry, I'm a little late!" Touko cried defensivly.

The black-haired one, previously identitfied as Annnie, scoffed. "A little? You're 1 minute late! That's 60 seconds!"

"Ok, ok. Anyway, we have 4 new members today. Why don't you all introduce yourselves?"

The first girl went first; "My name is MsWildLuck, but you can call me Wild. I like bacon because its BACON! Next!"

"I'm Tiger Demon of Light, but you can call me Demon. I like bacon because it sizzles in your mouth when it comes right of the pan. I also like the taste. Next!"

"I am Thorn, and I'm only here because Pokegirl's here. And I like bacon because its made of Tepig!" the Snivy muttered.

"Finally! Ok, my name's Flumen Flamma Argo, and my nickname is Flam."

"Ok, now that we're all done introducing ourselves, lets get back on to the topic for today. It is... Which is better, Popcorn or bacon?" Touko exclaimed.

**AN: Ok, sorry, short chapter, you're welcome to flame at me as much as you want... I need your opinons on this and why. So, this time, please fill out something like this if you want to be in the story;**

**Name:**

**Nickname:**

**Why you love bacon:**

**Which is better, popcorn or bacon:**

**Why:**

**And something like this if you already are;**

**Which is better, popcorn or bacon:**

**Why:**

**Thanks gaiz! :D Bye!**

**~Candy**


	3. Er

Er... Sorry for the long wait guys, but I got my Internet taken away... So I won't be posting as much. THIS IS NOT A CHAPPIE...


	4. CHEREN? Dun da daaaaaaaa!

**Ok, I am SO sorry for the wait, here's the next chapter!**

**Oh, before I forget, I do not own Pokemon. And here were the reviews for last chapter...**

**Which is better, popcorn or bacon: BACON!**

Why: because it is

**BACONS better  
Because bacons more awesome and if Popcorn was better i would be in the  
Popcorn lovers UNITE club not the bacon one**

**Thorn-"Do not even mock the sacredness of bacon by even suggesting that  
something is better than it. And I am here on my own accord. Pokegirl can take  
care of herself. I just want the bacon"**

**Oh, geez! I haven't been here in forever. Anyway, bacon is better but I think-**

Darkness: [Nope! Popcorn is better!]

Dang it. Get out of here! Get back in your story!

Darkness: [No. I want to join.]

Then admit that bacon is better than popcorn!

Darkness: [Bacon popcorn is the best.]

Gosh...

**Ok, on with the story!**

Everyone gasped. "How dare you mock the sacredness of bacon by simply suggesting that something is better than it?" Sushi and Thorn yelled. Thorn seemed to forget that he was a Pokemon and therefore could not talk.

"Well sorry! I needed a discussion topic!" Touko yelled defensively. "I'll go first. I think bacon is better, because it's FRIED! Not popped! Therefore it's good."

"Um, Bacon is better because it is. Simple as that." Demon **(Oh gosh I haven't been on here so long that I forgot everyone's names...)** replied.

"I like bacon because it's bacon and it's more awesome and if popcorn was more awesome I would be in the Popcorn lovers Unite club!" Wild **(Again, sorry for inconsistencies...) **exclaimed.

"Bacon is epicly awesome. End of conversation." Annie stated, folding her arms.

"Ditto," Sushi replied.

"Bacon is better, but bacon popcorn is the best." Flam replied.

"Um guys?" Sushi asked. "Thorn has a surprise for you."

Thorn snapped his _leaves?_ and a Tepig came racing through the open door. A black-haired boy with one strand sticking up was hot on its heels.

"CHEREN?" Touko asked.

Everyone gasped.

**What's Cheren and his Tepig doing there? Does everyone have athsma? Will I ever learn how to spell? All these questions will be answered in the next chapter of... BACON LOVERS UNITE! But only if you R&R. ;)**

**Ok, Candy OUT.**


	5. The end WAAAAAA

**AN: Okay, I know y'all will kill me... As I said in my other HP oneshot, I will be updating when I have time. And gueeesssss what? I have time now! So enjoy this incredibly short chappie! **

**PS. Sorry Guest and Darkness, this is the last chapter, and people are all getting free bacon, so sorry, I'm afraid you're not part of the club. But... I might name a sequel... *Wiggles eyebrows***

* * *

Touko stared at Cheren, whose hair was flopping over his eyes, and who was wheezing, almost passed out on the floor.

"What... Did... You... Do... That... For... Tep...?" He asked one he had gotten his breath back.

The Tepig shrugged his chubby little shoulders.

Thorn smirked proudly. "I brought him here."

"Oh yeah?" Touko asked."What for?"

"BAAACCCCOOOON TTTEEEEEPPPPIIIGGGG!" Annie yelled, getting what Thorn was getting at.

She ran towards him, arms outstretched, yelling, "YOU ARE THE BEST POKEMON ON EARTH!"

Thorn surprisingly, accepted her hug. All he did was grunt a little and smirk in satisfaction.

Tepig looked scared now. "Tep, tep, PIG!" he oinked to his trainer.

Touko assumed that was Pokemon for, "Don't let them eat me, please!"

"Do something!" Cheren snapped at Touko. " My POKEMON is about to be eaten!"

Indeed, Annie looked like she was going to strip Tepig's flesh from his bones.

"Uh... Guys?" Touko asked tentatively.

"Ma'am yes ma'am!" Wild exclaimed, her arm snapping up into a salute.

"Oh dear, Wild, you can be so cheesy at times." Demon sighed.

Annie paused just inches from Tepig's tail, her mouth wide open.

Sushi sighed and rolled her eyes at everyone.

Ima snorted at Annie.

The room fell quiet.

"I'm afraid we won't be able to eat Tepig," Touko started.

Behind her, Cheren muttered, "Afraid? AFRAID?"

Touko ignored him and continued, "But I do have a surprise for you."

"Ooh! Is it a Bacon Lovers Unite pin with a picture of a bacon on it?" Ima asked. **(Eek, I kinda forgot about you in the last chappie, didn't I? SORRY!)**

"Or a shirt made out of bacon!" Wild guessed.

"WAITT..." Demon exclaimed. "I know! It's a bacon smelly sticker!"

Sushi narrowed her eyes, thinking. She remembered what she had said to Touko when everyone had left the day before.

"I know what it is! It's a BACON PARTAY!" she yelled.

"BINGO!" Touko replied, then produced from who-knows-where a giant plate of bacon.

And so, everyone was happy wearing bacon and Tepig was left unscathed for the moment.

THE END!

**Hehe, I loved writing this chapter! I might actually be making a sequel soon... So hang on tight, cause the BROWNIE LOVERS UNITE CLUB IS COMING UP NEXT! **

**Candy OUT.**


End file.
